Stay! Third story in the 'Don't let me sleep' series.

Azrael grasped Moki firmly by her upper arm. He found the door to a small parlour, pushing her through it.

"What do you THINK you are doing? Angering me is one thing? But Senoy?! He does NOT have the restraint I do! If you have no desire to exist, then By all means continue as you have been! Otherwise.." she shook his head. Moki didn't seem the LEAST bit concerned, she was preening at herself in the mirror. It puzzled Azrael that she was seemingly..pleased. As if she KNEW something that he himself did not. THAT was itself cause for concern.

His eyes narrowed as he was about to question her, when his question was answered without him ever voicing it. SanSenoy waltzed into the room. "AHH..Madame Moki...I wish to speak with you." SanSenoy smirked as he knew full well that Moki would do just as he asked. Unlike Azrael he truly ENJOYED Moki's twisted outlook on life. Her plots and schemes delighted him. He waived a dismissive hand at Azrael. The Blond Angel bristled as Moki's eyes twinkled. She ADORED it when Azrael was jealous. He would work THAT much harder to please her.

But inside Azrael was secretly thankful for the interruption. Although he allowed his body language to appear as though he was angry. He turned to Moki as if to protest, and he was met with a soft dirisive laugh. Inside he rejoiced. Moki herself was ENCOURAGING him to leave. EXACTLY as he wanted to do.

He turned apparently in annoyance. But Azrael was eager to leave..Eager to atleast be in Lillith's presence once again.

But on his way he saw Ro'byn run up the stairs. Not far after her Gerard ran following her, he hissed at Azrael as he passed him, he was not following Ro'Byn but instead stopped and looked araound as if searching for someone.
"THIS is ALL YOUR fault WINGLESS Wonder!" A moment later Senoy thrust a glass shattering it against a wall not far from Azrael's head. Gerard ran knowing the glass was aimed at him.

Azrael inteneded to persue him. He needed to find out what could have happened. Moki had not kept him away for very long.

Senoy stormed out. "AZRAEL! You FIND that...MINION! You get him UNDER control! I do NOT want him ANYWHERE near Ro'Byn!" and he started up the stairs after Byn.
"WAIT!! Wait..I have known Ro'Byn longer than you..She needs.. a chance to ponder...I AGREE that perhaps Gerard will upset her futher..But learning the truth, as I assume must be the case, must have upset her a great deal. She has learned that you are her Father, yes?"

Senoy just nodded he was FURIOUS. "Not as I had planned. I DID want to claim her but..I lost my temper.. The ..truth came as a shock to both she and Her mother."

"Lillith?..She did not know?!" Azrael could NOT hide his horror.

"No..She..I never allowed her to know of the plans you had made. She did infact believe that Lawerence was indeed Ro'Byn's father."

Azrael's mind was reeling. "She must be devisated.." he said quietly.

But the heavens were smiling at Azrael, because Senoy chose to believe he was concerned for Ro'Byn. "Yes..She..paled. She..was VERY angry. but it was a cold terrible anger...She IS my daughter...But she is also Lillith's, and as such I KNOW she will act out. I do not want Gee inspiring her."

"No. That is wise...May I suggest a guard outside her door? Someone who thinks of Ro'Byn's interest before anyones else's. Someone who will be fair."

"Raphael." Senoy stated, rather than questioned. "He is the obvious choice." Azrael nodded. "And The Saint. THEY will keep her safe. AND not influcence her. Most importantly they will keep SanSenoy from harming her."

"It is decided. Your suggestion is a sound one. I will approach them and ask their assistance." Without another word Senoy turned back and sought out the pair. His only concern was for his offspring.

Azrael's was for her mother....

YES!! Please fix it!!! quickly!!!

DAMN i left my finger at moms...

Azrael turned away as Senoy sought out Raphael and The Saint. Azrael now had only one thought in mind.

To find Lillith.

She must have been devistated. He had known when she carried another child, that Senoy and Not Lawernce was the childs father.

He Knew BECAUSE he had slowly been preparing her to recieve his own seed.

Azrael KNEW how much Lillith longer for another child.
He knew too, how much he did as well.

In truth, HE had wanted to give Lillth another child.

He hung his head. He had failed. He had planned on visiting her that night. He had intended to settle the bad blood between them. To BEG for her forgiveness.

Instead when he arrrived...

"WELL well if it isnt the wingless wonder. Looking for my woman?"

Azrael turned slowly as he heard the voice. He NEW it was NOT Rardy speaking.

"If you speak of the Mistress of this house, of the Lovely Lillith, you are wrong. Lillith Is NOT yours."

"Perhaps..But Lilly IS MINE. Lillith's body mearly houses her."

Azrael charged the boy, pinning him to the wall. He growled, "YOU will leave this boy. YOU are in part the cause of this trouble."

Gee sneered at him, "YOU wanted another child so badly...you created one. I am your Son..you and Lillth birthed me the Night you Took Rardy. You FORCED your self on him, you and Lillith. You Tormented your precious BOY for so long, hurt him so deeply, that I was borne of that RAPE. MY existance is DIRECTLY the RESULT of your's and her's ABUSE of his body, rendereing his soul in two, that night at the House of Wolves. I was Birthed By Your RAPE of him. Just as MY SWEET Lilly was borne of Senoy's Rape of Lillith!"

Azrael reacted as his he'd been struck. He dropped the boy's body. Rardy landed with a thud.

He looked up at the angel his face bewildered. Azrael KNEW Gee had for the moment left the body. "Is...Is it TRUE Az? Are you GEE's creator?"

..... O.O !!!

oh snap!!! i mean... i already KNEW that... but... imagine trying to answer that question.... just... try to fathom....

*shakes inflatable finger* CUMMON AZ!!

Azrael looked down at His Boy panting, the pain in his heart, was written all over Rardy's face. "Are YOU the reason he's inside me? The reason I lost Byn?"

Azrael's head started shaking of it's own accord. "....no...NO!" he spun away running blindly through the unfamilar house. He had done to His Boy, the only soul that he loved with a love to rival His Beloved Hadequa, the unspeakable. He had litterally torn him in two.

Azrael slowed to a daze. He was no better than his own enimies. Senoy and his minions had done the very same to Lillith. In an effort to releave the Heart of His Heart, he had tried to pull the evil from her, and thus LILLY was born.

'You WANTED children...LOOK at your progeny.' he growled at himself. Azrael stumbled through a doorway as if being drawn there.

He looked around in a daze, everything was green. He let out a harsh chuckle.
"This garden, it called to The Gregorii within me..This was what I was made for...WHY could I not have been satisfied with this?"

'You are only partly correct Father...' he heard his Sweet Sari in his heart,
'..Indeed the reason you were created is within this garden, IT needs your tending and care as it ALLways has, and always will...the Heart of Your Heart needs you...and no other..JUST as you need her.'

Az suddenly looked around, the noises of the party in full swing at the other end of the house, suddenly died away. He had no doubt it had not stopped, he just had no care to hear it anymore. He stilled himself, Knowing instinctively how to find her.

A soft, yet harsh sound entered his ears. His Hadequa was crying. Sobbing quietly hidden within this Garden. Azrael KNEW he wished to be the only one to console her. HE NEEDED to be. The outside world and all his enimies could wait. He would deal with each and everyone of them in due time.

This moment in time, this was might be his last chance at seeing and loving and holding her.

He had to show her how he really felt. How much his soul needed hers.

He followed the sound to a small alcove. He straighten his clothing and stepped before her.

As she liftted her head her eyes burned at him.
"Have you come to Gloat my lord angel? Does it delight you to see my heart torn to pieces?"

Did i mention how much i love Sari?

Cummon Az, fix it... i know you got it. You're the big bad angel, people quiver at your feet

Gerard watched as Azrael left him on the floor. Leaving him alone with the new horrible thoughts flowing through his head, thoughts of the night that was not so long ago when his own personal demon had been born. Gerard watched Azrael turn a corner, in the direction of Lillith’s safe haven. Part of him wanted to stop him, to do anything he could to prevent him from seeing, let alone touching, Lillith. For once though, he was in control, not ‘Gee’, and he did not want to be anywhere near the two of them. He did not think he could be near the two people who had cursed him with this inner demon, all because they could not stop themselves from using his body as they wanted to.
God…he needed a drink.
Gerard picked himself up off the floor and stumbled his way down the hall and toward the exquisite dinning room. Once he entered he lunged for an un-open bottle of wine, uncorking it with his teeth and swallowing a mouthful. As the wine entered his blood stream, joining the five or six glasses he had already had that night, he let out a soft sigh closing his eyes and sinking into a chair.
“Did Miss Ro’Byn not warn you about drinking too much,” a voice said from the other end of the table.
Gerard opened an eye, looking to see who had spoken. He saw ‘Patrick’ at the other end of the table, finishing up his dinner while others had left their food half finished.
“What do you care,” Gerard said, as he took another drink from his bottle.
“I care a great deal,” ‘Patrick’ said, popping another bite of rare steak into his mouth and licking the juices from the corner of his mouth. Gerard’s stomach turned, thinking of him and his ‘associates’ being anywhere near the people he loved.
‘Anywhere near Robyn’
Gerard allowed his eye to close again.
“I care because it’s quite the lovely melodrama, don’t you agree?”
Gerard sat up, slightly more alert, and a bit annoyed. “What do you mean?”
‘Patrick’ smiled at him, looking a bit creepy, “I mean what I say. I mean, after all, you are still in love with Robyn, while Frank is the one who will marry her it seems.”
‘Patrick’ took another bite of food before continuing, “of course Frank is having second thoughts, just because of who Robyn’s father is. And of course, this is just the drama that’s happened within the last twenty minuets. This does not mention everything that happened before or that is yet to come. This is a very interesting melodrama.”
Gerard shook his head, taking another drink before speaking, “you’re wrong. Frank isn’t stupid, he’ll marry her. Soon too, probably next week or something. He’ll do it to get her away from you and your kind.”
‘Patrick’ looked amused, “me and my kind?” He chuckled, “if you are talking of Senoy and his son, you are mistaken. I have no wish to hurt Robyn as they do.”
‘Patrick’ looked thoughtful for a moment, as if thinking of something or trying to read something that’s far away. “Perhaps even Senoy wishes her no further harm”
Gerard scoffed, standing from his chair with a wobble.
“Yeah right, and I’m a fucking saint.”
Gerard then stumbled out of the room and into the sitting room, missing ‘Patrick’s’ knowing smile as he left.
Gerard collapsed into a wing backed chair with his bottle, seeing no one in the room. He heard people upstairs though. It sounded as though Sansenoy was arguing with someone. Maybe he’d gotten to Robyn, but Gerard didn’t think so. He was pretty sure one of the other voices sounded like Raphael’s.
Gerard was just getting settled with his drink, when Frank came in the room. He was holding a drink and looking nervous. As Gerard watched him silently from his chair he remembered ‘Patrick’s’ words about Frank being afraid of being with Robyn because of Senoy. Gerard sneered, thinking of what a disgusting and weak person Frank must be to turn his back on Robyn because of that. If Gerard was in his shoes…but he wasn’t, and never would be again.
Frank still had not noticed Gerard in his high backed chair when Sansenoy came down the stairs with a smirk on his face.
As he came down the stairs, Frank seemed to finally realize that he should be protecting Robyn, and walked toward the stairs. As he met Sansenoy on the stairs he gave Frank a grin that even made Gerard’s blood run cold. Frank hurriedly ran past him and towards where Robyn’s room was.
Gerard looked at the large grandfather clock in the corner; it was only about five minuets until midnight. Only a very little while until everyone would be in this room, welcoming the New Year together. Gerard took another drink of his wine, welcoming ‘Gee’ back to the surface. This was one night he’d be happy to forget.

...oh.... shit....

This moment in time, this was might be Azrael's last chance at seeing and loving and holding his Hadequa.

He had to show her how he really felt. How much his soul needed hers.

He followed the small sobbing sound to a small alcove. He straighten his clothing and stepped before her.

As she liftted her head her eyes burned at him.
"Have you come to Gloat my lord angel? Does it delight you to see my heart torn to pieces?"

He knelt down on one knee before her, his hand hesitantly reaching out to brush a tear away. "No...no..Heart of My Heart...I wish you no harm..No heartache..I would that I could go back though time, stop all of the pain you have had to endure. If only I had never trusted Senoy.."

Lillith eyed him suspiously, not sure that this was not some cruel joke, a jest for Moki's amusement.

"Am I to believe you? Shall I trust my ears? Do you mean to tell me that you are truly sorry to see me as I am?"

He he bent his other leg, now actually kneeeling, and approached her on his knees.

"As I knee before you and know full well The All-Knowing sees and hears my words, I swear before all His creation and indeed on my own existance, I would give or do ANYTHING to relieve you of your pain."

He took comfort in the fact that she did not pull away from his touch. Azrael held his breath as he gazed into her eyes. Eyes he had gazed into for centuries, that he had fallen into at almost the beginning of time.

"Believe me. I Never intended to hurt you as have been this night..I am in truth the cause of all your pain. I was the reason he entered our lives. I was the reason he kept returning into them..my ONLY defence is that I did it all in order to give you THAT which you most desired."

"I wanted to give you a child..I succeed, for a time with Sari...but you paid dearly for his help in conceiving her... but You were STRONG..so Strong...and our love survived..inspite of me..despite Senoy and his minnons."

Lillith sobbed softly but it was in rememberence of her lost first child, not the pain she herself had endured. "I ALWAYS loved you Azrael, I hated you as well at times. But OUR beautiful Daughter...the miracle we were granted had NOTHING to do with Senoy's help. The Almighty had blessed us, even though we surely did NOT deserve it...YOU must see that. Senoy was NOT the reason she existed..YOU were. The ALL-Mericiful chose to bless you.., Bless us."

He smiled softly, "Is that how you see our history? That we were blessed? I then must BEG your forgiveness..because I tried to re-create that miracle centuries later. I KNEW you wanted a child..I knew you ached for one. I Knew too how much I longed for you to love me again.."

Her eyes changed, the light in them showing she was already guessing at the truth of the situation.

"You..you were haunting my dreams, I was terrified you had found me..you had spent so much time with Senoy, I believed you were coming to torment me...to take me away from -"

"From a mortal that did NOT deserve you...from a wretch that had not yet betrayed you but was schemeing to..I Loved you..DESPITE what it appeared..I Needed you...I WAS made to love you...I hated the fact that you STILL held such power over my heart..And yet..I ached to hold you..to see you smile at me..to feel our flesh mingled as one..I KNEW we belonged together..I assumed the best way to soften you heart to me was to give you what most desired, what we BOTH wanted.."

"Another child.." she whispered in disbelief and confusion.

He nodded. "I was secretly preparing you..adding the spices into your water..I intended to appear to you that night, to seduce you...to make you mine again..the child was to be the fruit of our union..Byn...she SHOULD have been mine."

Now both his hands cupped her small face, his voice harsh with agony, "I wanted..I wanted us to be a family...I wanted another chance, to give you what you most desired. But as I appeared on your terrace ready to beg for your favors..I heard Senoy with you..he had taken my place."

"No..NEVER did he take your place in my heart..no one, not even my dearest Rardy did that..as for Senoy..he threatened me, I was still fearful of you...he said he would reveal my hiding place to you...and was still afraid..I had been dreaming of you..."

"And you were afraid I would find you.."

"No...That I would RUN into your arms and Beg you to take me with you..and you would know the power you STILL had over me..How Much I STILL LOVED and ADORED you and then I would be at your mercy...as for what I MOST Desired...it was you."

"But Ro'Byn-"

"She was my delight, almost as much as my Sari..She is perhaps even more now, Now that I KNOW she was a gift from you."

"But Senoy-" "he May have provided the seed..but YOU planned her conception, made me ready to receive her from The Almighty...so in a way..She is STILL YOURS." she leaned towards his lips, "As am I, Azrael Gregorii of the Garden..I, Lillith of the Garden, I am STILL and always have been yours."

Azrael pulled her into his arms, "My Hadequa. Heart of My Heart.." and then his lips took hers in the quiet of the garden..

YESSSSS!!!!!

Its all FIXING!! YEEEEESSSSSS!! *snoopy dances!*

As Frank and Robyn came down the stairs together, Frank checked the grandfather clock in the corner. About three minuets until midnight…it felt like an eternity. Frank led Robyn over to the couch and helped her take a seat. She seemed worn down, but with the information she had just learned about herself…it was enough to wear anyone out. And he was guessing the reunion with Lillith and Gerard had not helped either. The way the two of them had been looking at one another on the dance floor…Frank remembered the two of them on the floor, but in his minds eye he realized that Gerard was not in Lillith’s trance, but was instead staring at Robyn nearly the whole time. Like he had been at dinner, and on the stairs when she came down in that beautiful soft green dress…and like he was now.
Frank looked over at Gerard, seeing his saddened red rimmed eyes. He would feel sad for his friend, if he did not know what he had been doing behind Robyn’s back…and was probably still doing now. Frank looked at Robyn, her eyes were on the clock.
“Wonder if anyone else is coming down for midnight,” Robyn wondered aloud, looking up at Frank and patting the spot next to her, waiting for him to take a seat. Instead, Frank stepped away.
“I…I am going to get a drink. Want anything?”
Robyn frowned a little as he backed away, but seemed to shrug it off. “A Sprite I guess…nothing with alcohol in it.”
Robyn gave him a little look that asked that he would do the same, but he chose to ignore it as he gave Robyn a small kiss (in front of Gerard. Eat your heart out) before leaving her.
“Be right back.”
He headed into the dining room, where the bar was set up. In a fridge underneath he pulled out a canned Sprite for Robyn, then set about making himself a drink. His last one was not nearly strong enough. He had to have more to survive the rest of the night. As he was setting about making his drink, smelling something in a dark green glass bottle, a voice sounded in his ear.
“So lad…you brought her back to us.”
Frank froze at the sound of Sansenoy’s voice, as if his body though the demon was a T-rex and if he held still long enough, he would not see him. Of course, there was no such luck.
“I must say…I am surprised that you are back. I thought when you escaped me that you were running off to marry…to ruin all that virgin blood I want.”
Frank let out a strangled noise, making Sansenoy laugh deep in this throat.
“What? Did you not know how close I came to finding you?.” He stepped right against Frank, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. “I was so close to finding you that when I found that filthy hole in the ground you two were hiding in, I could still smell her in the driveway. All that soft and sweet flesh.”
Sansenoy sniffed the air around Frank. “Yes,” he said, drawing out the ‘s’ sound, “still a virgin my lad? You are stronger than I. I would have taken her by now.”
Frank shrugged away from Sansenoy, grabbing the green bottle and pouring and downing a shot before he addressed Sansenoy. The drink burned like cough syrup, but it gave him the fire he needed in hid stomach.
He turned to face Sansenoy, “I’m not you, and I am not your ‘lad’ anymore either. So just back the hell off.”
Frank poured himself another one, this time it did not burn half as much. He was not sure if that was bad or not. When he turned around, Sansenoy was not pleased.
Frank scoffed, the alcohol in his blood adding to his courage.
“Confident are we? Perhaps I shall take my sister aside before the wedding and tell her all about you and the prior knowledge you had of Azrael’s boy’s affair. I am sure my lil’ sis will love to know all about it.”
Frank felt his face gray out, even as he muttered words to the fallen angel that he was not listening to. He entered the sitting room, seeing Smegaloff in another armchair and V and Raphael on an opposite couch as he took his seat next to Robyn and handed her the soda. She pressed a kiss against his cheek, thanking him. He took a sip of his drink, barely noticing the burn now.
As Sansenoy entered the room Robyn pressed her lips to his ear.
“After midnight I need to speak to my mother, then we can go.”
Frank looked into her eyes, seeing that when they left…they may not just be leaving for the night…it was probably for good. In the next moment Moki, Azrael, Senoy, and Lillith entered the room as the countdown to the New Year was about to begin.

oh. goodie.

hehehehehehehe I think STAY is BACK!!!!

Frank better watch himself

We go back just a bit...

As Azrael took his Hadequa's lips a soft sniffle left her. He was gentle in the way he held her, the way his lips caressed hers. She had spent so MUCH of her existance hating and fearing him..as well as loving him. Was not THIS her very reason for she existed? Was she NOT made to love him, just as he was Made to love her?

Her hands slowly slid up his arms, needing more of him. Azrael groaned softly pulling her closer into his arms, Lillith's anger pain faded for the moment, replaced by the comfort and love she felt flowing from him. She melted into his arms.

Slowly,and VERY reluctantly he released her lips, but did NOT pull away. "Heart of My Heart, Truest Love of my existance..I cannot bear the knowledge that I caused so MUCH of your pain. I BEG your forgiveness and your mercy..I DID NOT forsee his use of you..again..HOW could I have been SO blind?!" his anguished plea was whispered, he had NOT forgotten that they we not by ANY means in safety. The house was crawling with enemies, those who would relish nothing more than to see the lovers in pain.

"Oh Azrael, you do not KNOW the comfort this new knowledge has brought me." her soft laughter soothed his soul, despite his confusion. "You look at me as though I am mad..I do not mean that I am pleased that she is Senoy's far from it. But I do find joy that you wished this blessing for us again. That you sought to give me what you thought I most desired..that YOU could not banish me from your heart, any more that I could you from mine. THAT is what gives me joy."

His eyes slowly closed as he tucked her into the crook of his neck. "I DID...I wanted another child with you..I wanted us to be a family again..to be bound together always.. but I failed."

"No, do not think on that..Ro'Byn was willed into the world by The Almighty, she was His will. Even Sari spoke of her..there was nothing and no one that could have prevented her from coming into this world..You MUST remember that, and if it gives you any comfort, Senoy was.. he did NOT try to harm or abuse me in her conception..if any thing JUST the opposite..he was, now that I think on it, trying to make me forget you." Lillith said in a amazement. "Was..? IS it possible he truly desires me?"

"He would have to be blind not to." Azrael said begrudingly, "I must admit he DOES appear to be honestly enamored of you...but NO ONE, will ever love you as deeply as I do."

Azrael sat there leaned back against the fountain, with his Dove tucked into him, he realised he could have happily sstayed there for centuries, she still loved him, and she knew how much he loved her still. But there were others that they loved that needed him.

They HAD to be rid of Senoy and his son, and Moki most of all. He could NOT rest easily in his lover's arms, until he knew she and her daughter, Rardy and the rest, were safe from the evil and pain Moki wished to visit on them.
He reluctantly aknowledged their time was over.

"Heart of My Heart, I MUST, return..we MUST..our enemies, they must believe that we have not found our way back to each other..We have, have we not?"

"Yes My Love..I believe we have..but I agree, Moki and Senoy..and SANSENOY...they MUST not know we are of one mind and heart..WE must rid our lives...and BYN's and Rardy's lives of our ancient foes..MOKI and SanSenoy most of all..as for Senoy..I believe his exposure to Byn..it has..changed him."

"Do NOT soften to him my love, do not forget Egy-"

"STOP..Do NOT suggest I could ever forget what he did to me in Egypt..NOR the THEFT of My..OUR Sari from us in Greece..But I also believe he DOES care for Byn..he takes Pride in her..but he MUST be watched I agree..But think on it..what would you do if you were in his place? You would let nothing stop you from having time with your daughter yes?"

"Nor would I let anyone hurt her..INCLUDING my own flesh or my closest ally."

"Exactly..I believe he will give Byn a certain level of protection, Senoy will no one HARM his daughter."

"We can use this...Use him against our enemies..HE will help us destroy Moki..IF we plan this correctly." He looked at her with immense PRIDE.."Heart of My Heart..YOU amaze me.."

"A mother's first thought is always to protect her child..IF letting Senoy into her life will protect her from Moki and SanSenoy, then so be it..TO a point."

Azrael chuckled, "I pity Senoy should he cross you. Hell hath no fury.." he smiled genuinely for the first time in a LONG LONG time. "You, My Dove, I NEVER want for an enemy.."

He stood and straightened his dark jacket, then offered her his hand. "However we must let it appear that we are as such..at least for the moment we must appear to still be at odds."

"I will, FOR the Moment, continue with this charade..But I warn you..MOKI has wanted to harm my daughter for centuries, and has had my love in her bed for FAR TOO long..SHE WILL pay..I, LILLITH The Demon, as she as caused me to be known, as WILL cause her destruction..THIS I SWEAR."
The STRONG willed, DANGEROUSLY single minded Lillith from The House of Wolves re-immerged before his eyes. And it arroused the protector in him.

He pulled her roughly into his arms once more, The Warrior in him now encited to battle. "WE WILL Protect Ro'Byn, AVENGE OUR Sari, and save the others from ALL our enemies..We WILL with Heavens help..The Heavens WILL Help us Now."
His lips found hers one last time, their kiss a desperate pact. they clung to each other for just a moment and then he tore himself away, quite sure that if he did not they would SURELY be found out.

Lillith watched him leave. "Moki..you have had him FAR TOO Long..You have tried to take and harm all that was Mine..NOW..you WILL pay."